The best speed dating

It was incredibly refreshing to meet people in real life, for once.Stretching my social muscles was a good exercise, and it's fun trying to make strangers laugh.I tried to make my chest seem bigger, deepened my voice and swigged my sh***y beer like I was in a square state.Alas, despite my greatest efforts, I was not a very convincing top.Love is truly a numbers game, and these men knew this.

I could still tell he had a great personality to match his Prince Eric looks.

"I mean, I don't blame them, but it's not like I had a choice," I continued thinking to myself while mindlessly nodding along to what my fifth date was saying. Once everyone had registered, our organizer separated us into our respective groups. Whereas I tried to look as though I had just gotten off my fancy job as a writer, a majority of the men looked as though they had just left their shift at Aeropostale. Why were they dressed like that dude from high school who always tries to sell you knives when you run into him every trip back home?

"The online 'bottoms' sign-up sheet was all filled up! If I wanted to sail with the boys on this gay Noah's ark, I had to maybe fib to myself a little." And look where that got me. If you learn anything from me at all, it's that you should always dress how you want to feel, not how you actually feel.

The human race must have really pissed off a love god from some pantheon to be punished with the literal hell that is OKStupid.

Although I have no plans to meet with any of the men from my speed-dating event, I'm glad I went.

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