Says Sherman, "Couples have different boundaries but if you're fine with surprising each other and/or meeting each other's friends when they do visit, they won't feel like this outlier in your life or that you have a secret relationship." Going to bed angry is a bad enough feeling in itself, but couple that with hundreds or thousands of miles between you and disputes are instantly amplified.Sherman recommends mitigating fights by talking through concerns while they're fresh instead of letting them build, and if it can be done, tabling State of the Union discussions to in-person visits.you've been cheated on in the past, you should communicate how you can maintain a trusting relationship with the other person.With one caveat: "You need to make sure that you're not being super controlling and that the other person's okay with it.
Dealing with feelings of loneliness and separation can be one of the toughest aspects of being away from your partner.
Research shows that people who are able to meet each other's needs (or bids for attention) are the ones who stay together the longest.
Which brings us to the importance of establishing trust boundaries when you're not directly involved in the dailies of your partner's life. Sherman suggests that if you have prior baggage, e.g.
Or some people want to communicate multiple times a day.
Hopefully you've known this person before and you're not just starting out with the distance, so you have a greater sense of them, but you should figure out the best way to reach out to each other so you feel connected and have regular times to check in." With communicating, Sherman says, the most crucial thing to do at the outset of a long-distance relationship is to know what you need from your partner and to have the vulnerability to say so.